KNEAD IT!

About Me

My mother named me ****. For real. But I prefer Richard.

 

I graduated with high honors from Wellspring School of Allied Health in 2009. After that, I celebrated at Cheesecake Factory. (Lemoncello Cream Torte Cake is my favorite.) Then I went to work for a national chain of spas that locks clients into long-term contracts and charges their credit cards a monthly membership fee. (Yuck.)

 

In January 2010, I opened KNEAD IT! massage therapy. And at first, I limited my clientele to leprous lepidopterists from Luxembourg named Leopold. Because, hey, leprous lepidopterists from Luxembourg named Leopold need love, too. But today, with over 3,000 academic, clinical, and professional hours of experience under my belt, everyone is welcome at KNEAD IT! Everyone except mean people. And spiders. (I also don’t like lasagna.)

 

At 6’4” and 225lbs, I have the strength, mass, and leverage to therapeutically beat your body into submission. Which is not to say that I will hurt you. I won’t. Unless you crack a joke at my expense. (Grrr!) But my touch is intense. And that is why my most appreciative clients are those who abuse their bodies. Runners, dancers, circus clowns, and the like.

 

Thank you for taking time to read about me. I genuinely look forward to working with you. Especially if you are one of the surviving Bee Gees. All surviving Bee Gees are entitled to a 10% discount.

 

MBTM License Number: 2009028301

 

 

  •       Over 3,000 academic, clinical, and professional hours of experience

  •      MBTM, License Number: 2009028301

  •      Certified member in good standing of Associated Bodywork and Massage

  •      Professionals, Member ID Number: 844600

  •      Certified in CPR and First Aid

  •      2010 Founded KNEAD IT! massage therapy

  •      2009 Therapist, Massage Envy

  •      2009 Massage Therapy Practitioner, Wellspring School of Allied Health

  •      2006-2007 Doctoral Program, Cleveland Chiropractic College 

  •      2002 Accepted into Mensa 

  •      1993 B.A. Philosophy, St. Olaf College

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